Monday, 8 April 2013

All Gone To Plan.

So it's a day off with very little excitement, just getting on with the usual routine, I may see a friend this evening, all depends really. That's not what I'm blogging about though, you've guessed it, it's female related, of course it is. I've had a young lady from the past turn up in the last few weeks which is appreciated, for once. It's our friend who I'd take as a girlfriend, well, I would've done at the time I first told you about her, however, things have changed since. We had our Christmas fall out where I decided that she was a total whore and not to be trusted due to her bailing on me then lying about why.
After that day, I took her off everything, I didn't want to speak to her anymore, didn't want to see which one of the people I know she was flirting with. I forgot all about her, I just got on with my life, working and the such. It was easy, nothing stressful, no laying awake at night, thinking about what would've happened if we had got together, none of that 'the one that got away' bollocks, my memories of her were instead tucked away in a corner of my mind which is used for these scenarios.
A few months pass and I get a text message from her, letting me know of an event in the local area which I'd be interested in. Now, I'll give it to her, she started the message with "I hope you're over what you had against me but I thought you'd like this." I replied, being the soppy wanker I am, we had a nice catch up but that was it, no more, then she followed me again on Twitter with a new account and the inevitable happened, the flirting soon followed and she invited me to spend a night with her at some jam night in a pub. The pubs in her neck of the woods don't exactly have a great reputation but I thought I might as well, I don't have a good reputation, might as well give it go plus my social life consists of talking to girls online and trying to get naked pictures of them (which has produced some gems recently, I'll make an art exhibition of them one day) so the chance to see a girl naked is worth giving a shot, advice - if you're offered sex off someone you even kind of fancy, take it, you don't know when the next fuck is coming.
The night was a pretty standard night at a jam night in a boozer, local pissheads trying to be your mate, being forced to have eight drinks when you can't be bothered, some dreadlocked 90's throwback grunge guitarist trying to be the next big thing and a low percentage of women, however there were a couple of lookers in there (of course I look at other women when in the company of someone I'm trying to fuck) so that was a plus.
I stayed at hers after a walk home which included a debate whether to get a taxi to her house even though it was an ten minute walk and weighing up a kebab if we could find one that was open. We went straight to bed and yes, we fucked, exactly the result I wanted. This girl has recently got a boob job and has been at the gym a lot recently so her body is looking very lean and fuckable. During our drunken sex, I slipped and my hard cock went a little in her ass, she responded with "Wrong hole ____!" and then with that 'on the other hand' tone "you can fuck me there if you want?" Now, this is a dilemma for all men. Just to give ladies the heads up, men love anal, well, at least 90% do. It's something which a lot of girls find taboo (every girl should try it, The One was curious and it turned into her favourite) so finding a girl who loves anal is a major turn on never mind getting it handed on a plate so easily with someone you think is pretty fit so of course, I fucked her in the ass, she wanted it harder, I went harder, one point she was pretty much on the floor with her ass in the air. Unfortunately, being drunk means one thing for me - it takes me a life time to orgasm. Getting hard isn't the problem, it's taking forever to cum, I even get bored of fucking after a while, if you don't feel like you're climaxing at any point, then it's not going to be good sex. After a while, she asked if I was close to cumming which I replied in my honest manner "I'm never going to, let's spoon." That's exactly what happened, we stopped and we spooned. My cock was still hard but there was no way that I was going to have an orgasm, it was nice though to fuck someone I fancy, she kissed me and said she loved me fucking her, and in her ass, always nice to hear.
We parted the next morning and since, well, we've barely spoken. we've text each other saying thanks for the night but that's it, how rude are we eh? Probably for the best, I'll hear from her at some point no doubt and I'll be happy to spend the evening with her again. I suppose this encounter has been a success, right? I'd say so, we had a laugh, no-one has got hurt, we both got drunk and laid, cheeky bit of anal, no love lost, someone to spoon and no cum on her bed sheets - perfect as a planned one night stand can be really.

I'm off to get a steak.

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