2012

So the year is nearly over, sad really, it's been pretty enjoyable. All my goals I set myself have been achieved and I'm on course for next year too. This blog isn't about that though, this blog is about sex, love, lust etc etc etc. Shall we have the summary?
Well of course there was the famous tart off the television with her deceiving ways, basically a lying bitch who was so fame hungry, not really relationship material. My friend put it in great context when I was upset about her. He said "You got talking to her on twitter, she's one of the hottest ones, you met her, you fucked her, why are you complaining?" and that is exactly how I look back at it now, she was hot and out of my league on a social and physical basis yet I fucked her, all's well I suppose.
Then we had that girl who I would have as a girlfriend. We were meant to be seeing each other before Christmas, even got her a present but of course, she cancelled...twice. It's things like this is the reason why I don't trust women, seriously with all the cancellations I might as well not bother dating and it gets like that very often. I really liked this girl, she made me laugh and I was so comfortable with her, I could tell her anything but she obviously didn't feel the same about me. I text her on Boxing Day telling her how she made me feel, she gave me some pathetic response saying she was ill which can't have been that bad, she was out Friday and Saturday night. She's just another slut who needs to realise that good men don't come along too often.
So who else have we had? Oh yeah, the local 18 year old. Now, this girl, she'll need a name...errrrm Sex on the Beach? There we go, she's called that now. She's proper fit, stereotypically fit. She's a bit of a chav but seriously, one of the most gorgeous faces I've ever seen and a body to die for, very busty, nice. We were seeing each other over the summer, nice weather so we'd pretty much hang out down the beach, talking, sharing stories, kind of things you do. It was funny because I've known this girl for three years or so and she was a proper nightmare when she was younger, being 15 and turning up at parties wasted, her poor mum. She used to mix with some terrible people which she had ditched by the time we actually had a conversation (July 2012) and I discovered that she was actually a sweet, caring person with a good sense of humour which was such a pleasant surprise. Our dating cycle just fizzled out I suppose, she's unemployed so that limits many things that we can do, I suppose it was a bit of summer fun and we had a good time, there's certainly no hard feelings there and get still get on, I do think about meeting up with her again for a 'catch up' because she was fucking great at that, one of my top ten I'd safely say. I'll make that top ten blog another day.
Last but not least of course is my MILF. That's what she is, a MILF. She's 38 and has a 20 year old daughter. She's a redhead with fake breasts. That's all I'm saying. I met her out in my town one night and we fucked. We got talking a couple of months later and over the last two months, we've fucked every so often. She's good, there's no doubt about that. I'm not ageist or anything but seriously, older women know what they want. 18-21 year olds on a large scale don't have a fucking clue what to do in bed, that's why MILF appeals. Her main problem is that she sends some weird texts when she's drunk and obviously gets a bit emotional. I feel bad because she is a wonderful woman and she deserves to be loved by someone who will take care of her. I'm really not that man and I want to stop it. I did turn her down Christmas Day so I suppose I'm on course.
Right, they're the main women of 2012, the TV whore, the lying whore, the sweet 18 year who fucks like a porn star and the MILF who fucks like a porn star. There are others of course but I'll give you a short and sweet summary.
Gig girl - Met her at a gig, she was staying at the same hotel, we fucked a couple of times. She asked for my number which I replied with "Look, it's not like we're gonna see each other again but you can follow me on twitter if you like?" and she did.
Ex-colleague - Used to work with this woman, she moved away but ended up moving back as she broke up with her partner of six years. We met up through a mutual friend, all got a bit drunk and ended up having sex. She wanted me to stay and spoon her but I rejected and left. I told my boss about this and they said I was heartless. Okay, maybe I was a tad harsh but I'm selfish and I wanted to go home, I didn't want an awkward morning, I was this woman's boss!
Pub girl - Met this girl in our local, funny, never meet girls in there. I think she did the typical "Oh I love your glasses" which I get everywhere. We had a kiss and exchanged numbers. A week later we bumped into each other out, she came back to mine, we fucked and then she left, without a thank you or anything! What a tart, she totally used me! I wasn't that bothered, I was using her like I do with pretty much most women I fuck. Funny thing about this was I saw her a couple of times after, when I was running or in the pub and she'd ignore me. Then one night, out and about in town, I see her but ignore her. A few minutes later she texts me saying "Nice to be said hello to ;)" SERIOUSLY! This girl had ignored me every time I saw her and now she's having a go because I ignored her. Women eh? Anyway we did have a chat but that was the end of it. My friend told me her Dad is some psychotic ex-copper which would probably chase me around with a plank of wood with a nail in it. I've seen him, I can imagine him doing exactly that.
Berlin - Finally, there is Berlin. She is called this due to the fact she'd booked a weekend city break to Berlin. She was a lovely girl, a little older than me. Met her on POF, very sweet but also very regular. She seemed very interested in my love life and my history. I give off the impression that I'm bitter and not a fan of many people which is largely true, she seemed to love this. I went to visit, we had a nice evening, drank wine, talked (mainly me talking) and then she seduced me which was more fun than I thought it would be. She got upset with me because I led her on, I don't see how, I just flirted like I normally do but there we go, in her eyes I did and for that I apologised. I did say I didn't want anything more and I still don't, not with anyone. She needs someone sensible and reliable, she's that kind of woman, basically not my type.
Of course there's been others I have been texting etc which nothing has came about due to distance, effort or I've pissed them off, example @zoo woman who seems to have been hurt a lot, I think I want to save her, I think she's misunderstood and I want to help her, if she wants it of course, she's one of my three twitter crushes in fact, but don't tell her yeah? Then there's the usual people I've found on twitter which have made my days go by quicker in some way or another, thank you I suppose.
So there you have it, 2012 in women. I didn't think any of that would happen but it did and even though nothing came of any of them, I've enjoyed them all but I can't say I've learnt too much from them all I'm afraid. Hopefully next year it'll all be different, maybe I'll fall in love and have an adult relationship, maybe The One will turn up and I'll tell her to do one, maybe one of my twitter crushes will reveal her undying love for me and ask to run away with me to South Korea? Either way, I'm sure 2013 will be eventful regarding my love life and of course, I'll keep you posted.

Dernière nuit.

OK, I'm hungover, I mean, really hungover. Last night was just like the old days, didn't even expect it. I'll explain the events of the last 18 hours.
I started at my friends, pre drinking on vodka, had a cheeky spliff, loads of decent people from days gone by, some new friends made also, started out really well, lots of good music, proper decent pre drinks. Got a taxi into town, got out the cab, lit my cigarette and wandered out into filth but before I get in anywhere I get in the way of a mini, they stop before hitting me, I held both my hands up in a 'sorry but I'm a bit pissed' kind of way and guess who I see in the passenger seat? 'The One.' I looked straight into her eyes right after I took my hands down, I didn't smile, I just carried on like I hadn't seen her but then my friend shouts "Oi ____ it's _____ in that car!" That didn't help matters, everyone then asked me who she is and I explain that it's my ex girlfriend from nearly four years ago who I still daydream about her failing and regretting leaving me, sometimes I don't even think I like her at all, so why try and impress her? I want her to feel like I did when she screwed me right over. 
The night didn't get much weirder than that, I spent a lot of money, danced with girls but to be honest there was only one I spoke to and I'm pretty sure I know her from POF but she wasn't interested in me in the slightest which did piss me off, she wasn't gorgeous but she was certainly worth a go, not a fan of rejection, it's shit. 
We got back to my mates where they were carrying on but I couldn't deal with that, I needed to sleep, I wanted a bed, I got with zero women all night, spent a ridiculous amount of hard earnings and to top it off I only went and messaged 'The One' didn't I? Why doesn't a phone have some kind of app where if you're pissed, it saves the text message/picture message/facebook or whatever it is you've decided would be appropriate to send, thus saving you embarrassing yourself and looking like a total dickhead who in my case, only contacts people for pretty much one thing at that time of night. Any guesses? I ended up staying at my friends, we got a taxi back to hers and literally crashed out. 
In the morning, I woke up spooning my friend in her pants. We start to have sex. It was wrong, we're such good friends and even though we had sex years ago, it's something these days that just doesn't even get considered. She's an attractive girl but even in all the possible alternative realities, never would we be together, it's just not happening. We stop, well, I stop by saying "This is horrible and weird." which she laughs loudly at. We stop and fall back asleep.
We manage to get up, be usual friends, get dressed and drive to McDonalds in which the staff forgot about my order and tried to make it up with a free dessert which I decline seeing as I'm such a nice customer, they'd probably been out last night also, don't want to make their day worse.
I got home about an hour ago, I decide to delete the message I sent 'The One' but I get there and she's blocked me on Facebook. It's just insane how someone who at a point in your life knew you better than anyone can today be so cold towards you, it's not as if she smiled when she saw me, it's not like I smiled either though. I'm relieved she's blocked me, it's unlikely that I'll see her about and I don't really want to see what she's up to. I'm happy with my life now, everything is going really well, the studying I mean, the saving pounds and general happiness, I would hate it if she came in now and ruined it all, that woman hasn't been near me in two years and everything has been great, don't need it, don't want it. Stupid bitch.